[shambles]

I don't yet drive as I'm far, far too lazy, but I do cycle a lot and I've had some mega crashes on that. I've always been a bit mental on it. Nowadays, with the wisdoms of age on my side I'm a bit more careful but the 'motorcycle' Grand Prix's around my streets during my childhood year would often cause tumultuous sheaths of skin and rubber to intertwine in collage on the pavements about my house.

One memorable occasion was my trip into a pond. It's a brilliant setting for a nine year old motor-racing fanatic with a vivid imagination; there is a banking that edges this large pond and I used to pretend I was racing at a classic circuit in the Monza mould. The whole circuit (and there were about 10 different tracks in the area) was brilliant. It had slow hairpins, long radius curves, an S-bend and yes, this banked corner.

I used to race my brother, who must've been about six or something and too our collective mates. It was more a case of me bullying them into it all, I used to enjoy it when they got knackered. I got my comeuppance though when I lost it on the banking and ended up bum over breast in the pond. Drenched in algae, they abandoned what was left of the 150 lap race (that's an exaggeration..) and stood at the lip of the banking in gargantuan fits of childish laughter. Now we're all older, and some of the lads we still know and keep in touch with, I'm often reminded of this usually to the amusment of those who haven't heard the story before.

Those were the days.

In addition to that I've got a four inch scar on my right foot from where I decided to ride an old claptrap bike without any shoes or socks on; I've got scars on my elbows and knees from a literal high-side incident under braking and I'm pretty sure my brain is bruised.

One thing is for sure; when I have children, I'm buying them a crash helmet. No doubt.