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22 May 2005, 15:06 (Ref:1307007) | #1 | ||
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(In)famous marshals sayings thread
I will allow him to come here and own up himself. Oulton Park a few weeks ago, a certain marshal offered me his e-mail address and commented - "It's so cold I can't spell".
At Croft, a marshal referring to a driver with a chunk of loose bodywork who was one of a pack of four cars said "It's the middle one of the four". Any better? |
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Ken Professional Motorsport Photographer |
22 May 2005, 17:17 (Ref:1307262) | #2 | ||
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"It's been a quiet day hasn't it" - I've said that more than once before the inevitable happens...
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22 May 2005, 17:27 (Ref:1307279) | #3 | |||
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Quote:
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Live long and marshal ( its life Jim, but not as we know it!) |
22 May 2005, 19:19 (Ref:1307404) | #4 | ||
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(Radio controller to Safety Car)
"Safety car, Safety Car, you may now stand down, and thankyou for your invaluable assistance during the race". The race in question didn't have the provisions of the Safety Car!! (Me, on the phone to race control last weekend) "Hello, I've just noticed that car number 35 has no number!" |
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27 Years In Orange |
22 May 2005, 19:25 (Ref:1307416) | #5 | ||
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I can't remember saying anything that would go down in the history of motorsport as being an (in)famous saying but I'm sure there are people on here with better memories than mine who will no doubt relate something that I've said!
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You win some, lose some, wreck some - Dale Earnhardt |
22 May 2005, 20:11 (Ref:1307452) | #6 | |
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I remember being in a rescue unit on the way to Cadwell with two other regular ten-tenth,s members, when one, while looking out the window at the freshly ploughed field,s said "Isn,t the dirt dirty round here".
At which point myself and my colleague almost wet ourselves. It's alright Gizmo i won't grass you up. |
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22 May 2005, 20:12 (Ref:1307453) | #7 | |
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How about: "We've been lucky today, no Red Flags......"
Cue a Red Flag in every race following that statement |
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In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move |
22 May 2005, 20:40 (Ref:1307478) | #8 | ||
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Colleague's comment after spotting car clipping the grass at Quarry at Combe -
"Keep off the Grass" Colleague's increasingly unoriginal comment following each car which clipped the grass throughout the morning session - "Keep off the grass" Near the end of the morning session, a car has a massive rolling shunt in the next sector after clipping the grass and unbalancing the car in our sector. After the dust had settled and everything went quiet, my colleague sighed and quietly commented - "I told 'em to keep off the grass". |
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I want a hat with "I only wanted one comb" written on it. |
22 May 2005, 20:43 (Ref:1307481) | #9 | ||
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While discussing grading cards, the person I was with said... "Oh, I just need another incident signature to get my incident grade, an incident like..... THAT ONE!" as a Formula Ford decided to park itself on top of the tyrewall.
He got his signature and his grade "Prepare for Kart-a-geddon!" Just as the field of karts come around for the start and sure enough five way "explosion" of karts with two that were later transported to hospital (they were fine) "Magnet ON!" Said before most of my good incidents in my "magnet" season of 2000/2001 |
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22 May 2005, 20:53 (Ref:1307492) | #10 | ||
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Join Date: Aug 1999
Posts: 206
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Me at Pembrey last week waving off the last race on Sat (VSR's/Silhouttes) on their Green Flag Flag and then putting away the Green Flag and saying, we won't need that again today. This was promptly followed by 2 Red Flag stoppages.
doh........ |
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The Birthplace of Concorde. Welcome Home "Alpha-Foxtrot" |
23 May 2005, 08:45 (Ref:1307792) | #11 | ||
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Then there's always "Let's close down the medical center".......
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23 May 2005, 09:32 (Ref:1307836) | #12 | ||
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Nurburgring 24-hr, this year, at post 142 (entrance to Karusell). Midnight. the middle of a four-hour shift. Dave Sweet and I are taking half-hour turns on the yellow, I have just handed over to Dave, I am busting for a p** (at my age it gets you that way) so I say to Dave, "Its all quiet, I'll be a couple of minutes".
When I return, Dave is frantically waving the yellow board plus the yellow flag, in the middle of the concrete part of the Karusell is a very battered SEAT which had rolled following a wheel loss. Luckily Don and Roger on the next post had also heard the crash and provided cover. The driver had extracted himself and made his own way to the bank. Next time I will take a bucket with me! |
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According to Julius Caesar, the most civilised people in Britain lived in Kent. - QI Elves. |
23 May 2005, 11:09 (Ref:1307908) | #13 | ||
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How about Race Control at OP, during final lap of qualifying or race:
"No recoveries, Rescue 1/2, Fire 1/2 hold position for a quick turn round." Cue mayhem! |
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Nil illegitimus carborundum |
23 May 2005, 11:58 (Ref:1307951) | #14 | ||
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One sadly no longer with us radio controller to recovery vehicle driver Walter Jones, "Can you do a straight tow at Hilltop, please". Only problem was, we were at Anglesey at the time!
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23 May 2005, 12:33 (Ref:1307992) | #15 | ||
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"Don't worry, this is always a quiet post!"
And "It looks like were going to get a lunch break today!" |
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23 May 2005, 12:33 (Ref:1307993) | #16 | ||
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And I Missed, "I think it's safe to take off my waterproofs now!"
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23 May 2005, 15:47 (Ref:1308144) | #17 | ||
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At a BRDC/BRSCC extravaganza a couple of years back, a chief at the morning meeting told us the GT's would have a rolling start. We all murmered and dispersed. It was only when I looked in the programme I found out - No GT's!
I can't say who the balding chief was, but William the first was one! Plus I only have think "I think I'll watch the Palace today" and they go a goal down! |
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The only stupid question is one not asked! |
23 May 2005, 16:28 (Ref:1308179) | #18 | ||
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at my first meeting..my io said if the car looks as though its been to a dodgy pannel beater...thats cos it has, always look out for teh dented ones, theyre most likely to crash!...sound advise
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23 May 2005, 17:07 (Ref:1308216) | #19 | ||
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"Odd, that pork pie i had 10 mins earlier hasn't worked....." - famous last words before the time-released pig 'n' pastry product does it's worst.
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...not with a bayonet through your neck you couldn’t. |
23 May 2005, 19:11 (Ref:1308344) | #20 | ||
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i know exactly which marsall it was who couldnt write his own name because he was to cold as i was stood next to him and ken on knickerbrook but i will let him grass himself up!!!
i remeber at druids on fpa day saying to our io, "god, i could have a sleep, its like a set of parade laps this!" 10 seconds later we were all running for cover as the f355 crashed through the barriers! |
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23 May 2005, 20:40 (Ref:1308412) | #21 | ||
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I once picked up the rescue units PA mike instead of the radio mike and Promptly told all the speccies near by that we had got the driver out of his car.
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23 May 2005, 21:10 (Ref:1308430) | #22 | ||
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I remember the I.O. at last years GP saying I'm bored could do with something to happen, followed by the bang of a F3000 in the barrier, the next time the comment was made a Porsche into the barrier
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24 May 2005, 08:26 (Ref:1308702) | #23 | ||
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"A Bit of gaffer tape and some T-cut and it will be good as new" said jovially if but a little too loudly, the driver/student/foetus of the recently modified formula BMW stood next to us had lost his sense of humour at that point.
On another note my cousin doesn't need to say anything but he is not allowed to touch the yellow flag, ever. he is the prince of darkness better than any "pig in pastry" or other crash talisman. |
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i'm easy to spot, i wear bright orange and at full speed have the turning circle of a small tanker |
24 May 2005, 17:28 (Ref:1309174) | #24 | ||
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Said to the driver of a Morgan who was concerned that it would be difficult to retrieve from it's position, which was standing on it's nose at the bottom of the valley.
"No worries, bit of rooting powder we could get a good tree going there." Some people just can't take a joke... |
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Bill Bryson: It is no longer permitted to be stupid and slow. You must choose one or the other. |
24 May 2005, 17:52 (Ref:1309200) | #25 | ||
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A month or so ago I was walking round the Padock (We had a lunch break for once!) When I came upon Tony Dolley's 206, I comented on how clean and intact it was, A hundred yards into the start of the race he only goes and rolls it right infront of me.
I won't coment on conditions of cars again! |
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