'Twas the night before Christmas (Marshal Style!)

[EvilPumpkin]

hep, you're going to Hell.....

Hmmm well haven't really thought about it - I'll see what I can come up with!

[Hepatic]

yeah, always been on the road to hell, thought i might as well add to the reasons

Merry Christmas!

[pinki]

fell off the thread when EPW moved it

[Jim Lamb]

Time to resurrect this thread in preparation for the 24th. It always cheers me up.

Originally Posted by jase

Ok, I know it's only the 5th, but thought I'd try and get in the mood by posting this:


'Twas the night before Christmas And all through the house
not a keyboard was stirring, no clicking of the mouse
The probans were hung up or stuffed into bags
Gathering dust til next season, along with the flags

The marshals were nestled all snug in their beds
While visions of incidents danced in their heads
The rescue unit pixies had hung up their hoods
And all settled down for a long winter snooze

When out in the garden there arose such a clatter
The Pumpkins sprang from their beds to see what was the matter
Away to the window they ran like a flash
Tore open the curtains to look at the crash

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Reflected off the debris that was strewn out below
Rolled over on the pavement well what should appear
But an overturned sleigh and some panicked reindeer

The driver was stuck, shouting "get me out quick!"
They knew in a moment it must be St. Nick
The rescue call went out - and extinguishers in hand
Marshals quickly arrived from every land

There were marshals from Britain, there were marshals from Spain
There were marshals from Ireland - from around the world they came
There were doctors in red and rescue crews in green
(The marshals in black could just barely be seen)

"oh free me" cried Santa "Oh free me I beg!
I think one of the reindeer just peed on my leg"
The Rescue Crews assessed and looked round and about
"it's a spinal extraction - we're cutting him out!"

"oh no no" moaned Santa "you'll damage my sleigh!
I must deliver presents - just free me, I pray"
"sorry santa" said Rescue "your safety comes first"
And fired up the Holmatro whilst Santa just cursed

Ok here's the problem, the IOs all said
We've got all of these children tucked up in their beds
Secure in the knowledge that their presents will arrive
And this *$$%£$% sleigh is just not fit to drive

Then one hefty marshal got a bright idea
"we can take them ourselves - we have eight reindeer.
we can ride them ourselves, with the pressies in a sack"
And he promptly climbed up upon poor Blitzen's back

When Rudolph saw this, he ran off at high speed
A big dent in his back he really DID not need
The Irish marshals gave chase as he charged up the hill
(chasing deer is a little known Irish marshalling skill)

Well Rudolph was harnessed, as were Donner and co.
The marshals mounted up and were ready to go
With toy sacks in hand, the starting flag unfurled
And signalled their race to bring presents to the world

Meanwhile, poor old Santa had finally been extracted
And was apologising for having overreacted
The docs passed him fit, although he had a bruised butt
"never mind" said the crew chief "here you are, have a donut"

The marshals were gathered, whispering in hushed tones
When the quiet was broken by the ring of a phone
"We've done it" they said "so give us three cheers -
And tell the fat red guy to get in the beers"

After much bodging repair, Santa was off on his way
With duct tape trailing from the dents in his sleigh
The marshals went home and got back to their dreaming
Carrying their last sight of Santa waving and beaming

When all had gone home, a faint jingling was heard
It was Santa again - but he spoke not a word
At each marshal home he dropped off a present
"good weather for one day at your choice of event"

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
But you could hear him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,

"HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, AND TO ALL A GOOD-NIGHT!"

A very Merry Christmas to all,

Regards

Jim

[GoGoGadget]

Originally Posted by jase

Ok, I know it's only the 5th, but thought I'd try and get in the mood by posting this:


'Twas the night before Christmas And all through the house
not a keyboard was stirring, no clicking of the mouse
The probans were hung up or stuffed into bags
Gathering dust til next season, along with the flags

The marshals were nestled all snug in their beds
While visions of incidents danced in their heads
The rescue unit pixies had hung up their hoods
And all settled down for a long winter snooze

When out in the garden there arose such a clatter
The Pumpkins sprang from their beds to see what was the matter
Away to the window they ran like a flash
Tore open the curtains to look at the crash

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Reflected off the debris that was strewn out below
Rolled over on the pavement well what should appear
But an overturned sleigh and some panicked reindeer

The driver was stuck, shouting "get me out quick!"
They knew in a moment it must be St. Nick
The rescue call went out - and extinguishers in hand
Marshals quickly arrived from every land

There were marshals from Britain, there were marshals from Spain
There were marshals from Ireland - from around the world they came
There were doctors in red and rescue crews in green
(The marshals in black could just barely be seen)

"oh free me" cried Santa "Oh free me I beg!
I think one of the reindeer just peed on my leg"
The Rescue Crews assessed and looked round and about
"it's a spinal extraction - we're cutting him out!"

"oh no no" moaned Santa "you'll damage my sleigh!
I must deliver presents - just free me, I pray"
"sorry santa" said Rescue "your safety comes first"
And fired up the Holmatro whilst Santa just cursed

Ok here's the problem, the IOs all said
We've got all of these children tucked up in their beds
Secure in the knowledge that their presents will arrive
And this *$$%£$% sleigh is just not fit to drive

Then one hefty marshal got a bright idea
"we can take them ourselves - we have eight reindeer.
we can ride them ourselves, with the pressies in a sack"
And he promptly climbed up upon poor Blitzen's back

When Rudolph saw this, he ran off at high speed
A big dent in his back he really DID not need
The Irish marshals gave chase as he charged up the hill
(chasing deer is a little known Irish marshalling skill)

Well Rudolph was harnessed, as were Donner and co.
The marshals mounted up and were ready to go
With toy sacks in hand, the starting flag unfurled
And signalled their race to bring presents to the world

Meanwhile, poor old Santa had finally been extracted
And was apologising for having overreacted
The docs passed him fit, although he had a bruised butt
"never mind" said the crew chief "here you are, have a donut"

The marshals were gathered, whispering in hushed tones
When the quiet was broken by the ring of a phone
"We've done it" they said "so give us three cheers -
And tell the fat red guy to get in the beers"

After much bodging repair, Santa was off on his way
With duct tape trailing from the dents in his sleigh
The marshals went home and got back to their dreaming
Carrying their last sight of Santa waving and beaming

When all had gone home, a faint jingling was heard
It was Santa again - but he spoke not a word
At each marshal home he dropped off a present
"good weather for one day at your choice of event"

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
But you could hear him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,

"HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, AND TO ALL A GOOD-NIGHT!"

Originally Posted by Teletubby

But our Rescue Crew wear red so we are feeling neglected now!

Does this make you the head pixie then Martin? - no doubt we will see very pointy safety boots at rescue training if so !

[pinki]

Eeek, that time of year again. I always get a reminder when someone posts on this thread at Christmas. As some of you know I have been out of the game for a long time now but I hope you all have a lovely and safe Christmas.

[SamWaters]

Brilliant, not seen this one before. Merry Christmas all.

[aland]

raises a smile every year

merry christmas to all marshals

[Sparky-steve]

First time i've seen this. its really great nearly choked reading it whilst having a brew

[Matthews Dad]

Very appropriate for the recent weather as well

I wonder how many of the marshalling brethren have been involved in incidents requiring their skills over the past few very slippy days


Happy Christmas to one and all

[Mark Mitchell]

Originally Posted by Matthews Dad

I wonder how many of the marshalling brethren have been involved in incidents requiring their skills over the past few very slippy days

ME!!
So far....... 3 RTA's
half a dozen or so banged/cut heads
countless broken wrists/ankles
2 NOF's
and a chipped tooth (Honest!!)

[Matthews Dad]

Originally Posted by Mark Mitchell

ME!!
So far....... 3 RTA's
half a dozen or so banged/cut heads
countless broken wrists/ankles
2 NOF's
and a chipped tooth (Honest!!)

You dont count Mark, you do the picking up the pieces stuff in your working life

but I would be very happy to see the blues and twos if i needed them, i work in the rarified world of a cancer centre!

[Shelagh]

EP should put this to music and enter "Britain's Got Talent".

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all and sundry!

Bill & Shelagh

[aland]

time to re-awaken this thread... bump

[Guinness2702]

My feeble effort. Not even close to EP's original, but what the hell.....

Three cheers it's Christmas, sing hip-hip hooray,
Small shame there's but one chance for marshals to play,
When bikes and cars unite we're sure to feel gay,
So at Mallory we'll meet up on Boxing Day.

With bottles and shovels and flags and some brooms,
Getting dizzy inhaling the usual fumes
That's the cause of our shock so the clerk assumes.
But really it's bikers in Santa costumes.

So what does the new year have for us in store,
There's things that we'll love, and things we'll abhor,
The bridge and the priory, they'll be manned no more,
But welcome Snett 300 with corners galore.

So Christmas greetings to the friends we hold dear,
As the 20-10 conclusion draws ever so near,
So we'll raise our glasses and fill them with beer,
As to one and all we wish a happy new year.